Nightmares are very scary dreams - but to a young child they seem real. Here are some tips that may help your family cope:

What is a nightmare?

A nightmare is a distressing dream that causes at least partial waking.  Children may wake scared, anxious and upset. Nightmares may start at age 2 and peak between ages 4-6. Common themes are being chased by frightening persons ('bad guys', witches, monsters etc) or animals (lions, tigers, bears etc). Nightmares seem to be a part of normal development and do not usually signify serious problems. They usually occur during the early hours of the morning, but each child is different.

Nightmares may be caused by:

• The ordinary stresses of childhood - at this age children are learning to deal with a variety of strong emotions- the nightmares may act as a release of pressure for these stresses.
• Watching scary TV shows or reading scary books. Even the news, heard or watched depict frightening themes to children. Remember, what is scary to one child may not be scary to another.
• A traumatic event such as surgery or an accident.
• A child with a vivid imagination.
• Fever.

What can you do if your child has a nightmare?

• Go to your child - comfort him by giving him a hug - use a calm, gentle voice.
• Take his fears seriously - you and I know there is not a monster under the bed, but to a child recently woken with a nightmare it seems very real. You may like to check under the bed, but let the child know it is for their benefit, not because you feel there is any danger.
• It may help for your child to talk to you about his nightmare. Together you could think of a different and 'happier' ending for the dream. Putting the nightmare into words can make it seem less powerful, changing the ending can help children to master their fears.
• Stay with your child until he feels calmer - if he is particularly upset, try quietly reading a favorite book or singing a song. (My little girl rarely has nightmares, but if she does I need to lay next to her until she gets back to sleep).
• The next day you could draw or role play the nightmare with the new 'happier' ending. Allowing children to play out their fears is a powerful tool.

To help prevent nightmares you can:

Stick to an established bedtime routine. This is a great start to helping a child feel safe. I know one father who as part of his children's bed time routine recites a little poem designed to keep away nightmares.  It goes like this:

• Monitor children's television and books. As adults we tend to forget that most movies, depict at least one baddie. What is scary to one child may not be scary to another.
• There are plenty of books that you can read to your child that address the issues of nightmare and night fears. These types of books will help children to explore and master their feelings and fears.
• Having a night light, keeping the door open or sharing a room with a sibling may also help a child feel safe. If the nightmares are becoming more frequent or you feel something is not right, then seek help from your health professional.

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